Early one morning, I awakened from a dream that left me with more questions than answers. Dreams, I am told, reveal some aspects of our lives that may be in need of attention. As students of spiritual text, we learned about Joseph’s dream of a multicolored coat and the later interpretation and subsequent actions. In my experience, I am not sure that I could assign meaning to every dream I had, nor would I want to. However, this dream seems different:
I was invited to join a very large used car dealership, as an inexperienced salesman. The main building was poorly lit, dirty, and disorganized. The staff reflected the physical look and feel of the place; in essence, there was little difference between the ambiance of the establishment and the general demeanor and attitude of the employees.
In this setting, at this business, I felt entirely out of character. I am structured, organized, and very conscientious about my work. Not only was I different from the culture of this organization, but I was also the only non-Latino worker. I did not speak their language, nor did I understand their culture; however, I believe that I was led to this place by providence.
Some weeks after working at this establishment, I finally met Tony, the owner of the dealership. He was a tall man, around six feet, three inches, about 225 pounds, and nice features. Tony was soft-spoken, somewhat messy, and appeared to lack general interest in the business. He briefly spoke to the manager in the office and then disappeared as silently as he had entered the scene. I had no contact and made no connection with Tony on this one visit he made to the building.
Over the next few weeks, Tony visited the shop more frequently. He kept everyone in his business at “arm’s length.” However, over time, he slowly started paying attention to me and engaged in light conversation. I remained patient, always careful to let Tony initiate the topics and duration spent during each encounter. During my dialogues with Tony, I learned little about the man Tony. I knew nothing about his background, why he started the business, nor anything about the people in his life. He carefully shielded that information from me; however, knowing I needed to be patient, I was also determined to learn more about Tony.
One day, to my surprise, Tony said to me, ”come with me, I want to show you something”. The complex that housed the business was sprawling, but I hadn’t explored because I felt it wasn’t my business. Today, Tony asked me to accompany him on a walk down a path from the main building. We strolled for about five minutes without talking. On either side of the way were marshy lands with plenty of wildlife and beautiful sounds of nature. I slowed as I was distracted by the beauty, not realizing that Tony had continued walking around a bend and out of my sight.
I hurried to catch up with Tony, but I could not find him. I kept on the path until I came to a three-way fork in the road. I was perplexed and frustrated with myself. I felt that I might have squandered this one opportunity to learn something meaningful about Tony, but I had allowed my interests to interfere with the most important thing on which I should have have been focused. Now I was at a crossroads with no idea which path to choose to reconnect physically and emotionally with Tony.
As I stood at this new site, with wonder on my face and disappointment in my shoulders, one of the workers approached me and asked if I were supposed to meet Tony. I nodded, but in a somewhat disappointing tone, he informed me that Tony left. The worker continued to share how disappointed Tony was that I did not show up. He said I don’t ever recall seeing him this sad. I knew I had to find Tony and try to make it right, but I realized I most likely missed that one opportunity to minister to Tony. After all, he only asked me to walk with him, and I couldn’t even do that one little thing for him.
Stan Brooks, PhD
